Call me old fashioned...

...but I like my men without makeup. I know, I know, how terribly last century of me. The thing is, I quite like manbags and mannies and metrosexuals. And I wish I knew more guys who cry at sad movies. But, I draw the line at guyliner! (I didn't mean to pun, I swear, it just slipped out!)

The article quotes Pete Wentz dispensing advice on how a guy should apply eyeliner: "Smear it because when you're a guy, you don't really want your makeup to look perfect."

Ummm... sure, Pete. How about: when you're a guy, you don't really want to be wearing makeup, perfect or not.

The article does point out that plenty of guys have been wearing eyeliner for a while now. True. But -- and I'll say this as slowly as possible -- Jack Sparrow is fic-tion-al. Johnny Depp is an ac-tor. And as for the rest, do you really want to look like David Bowie?

Or Prince.

Or Marilyn Manson.

Think about it.

Apparently there are some regular joes out there with a clandestine eyeliner habit. At a beauty store in the DC area, about one guy a week buys an eye pencil, but usually behaves like he has a dirty little secret. Perhaps it's unfair that women are allowed to play with the gender lines to a much greater extent -- when was the last time a guy made a comment about a woman wearing boy-cut pants or cutting her hair nearly entirely off without being labeled an MCP?

Then again, PMS, pregnancy and higher wages for men aren't fair either. So, give us back the damn eyeliner and be a man.